Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus

Turn your eyes upon Jesus
Look full in His wonderful face
and the things on earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of His glory and grace

I've been listening to this hymn over and over again.

We, christians, know that we should do that.
I know. You don't have to keep telling me this. I know.
But how often do we actually practise this?
Every minute every hour every day?

And when we claimed that we have done that,
do we get the same effect?
does the worldly things grow dim in a strange way?
and the only thing left is His glory and grace?

How easy it is to lose focus on God.
I'm speaking for myself here. I know, I want to, but how come I can't?
Are worldly things that overwhelming that they are then given a position above His?

I tell God : "Keep reminding me to turn my eyes upon Jesus!"
For really, I can't do this on my own.
Isaiah 44:22 says,
"I have swept away your offenses like a cloud,
your sins like the morning mist.
Return to me,
for I have redeemed you."

God is calling me to keep returning to Him whenever I lose my focus.

Matthew 6:31-32 says,
"So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. "

Why should I be overwhelmed by worldly things?

Collosians 3:1-3 says,
"Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your^[a] life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory."

What differentiate us, those who were already saved, and those who haven't?
a new life, raised with Christ, we aim higher, we hold on to the Promise.

How easy it becomes even for those of us who profess to be faithful followers of Christ to get caught up in the "things of earth," so that our heavenly vision and values become blurred and dull. We miss the real blessing of enjoying the personal fellowship of Christ Himself in our daily lives by being too focused on doing things for God, instead of God Himself.

"Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:2

I find the below words extremely powerful,
read and meditate on it.

"I've seen the face of Jesus... He smiled in love on me;
It filled my heart with rapture, my soul with ecstasy.
The scars of deepest anguish ... were lost in glory bright;
I've seen the face of Jesus ... it was a wondrous sight!
Oh, glorious face of beauty, Oh gentle touch of care;
If here it is so blessed, what will it be up there?"

I can't wait to meet Jesus face to face!

About Love

What you can see in the picture is basically the verses from 1 Corinthians 13:4-8,13

What has gone through my mind that I decided, out of nowhere, to write about this topic. A very sensitive topic, I would say, as everyone believed that they know what LOVE really is. Everyone seemed to have their own notions of what love is. Be it the feelings of I-just-can't-live-my-life-without-you, or probably I-would-give-the-world-to-you, most love songs we heard on the radio, all the way to the lust, the deep deep desire, the control of someone else's life, the sacrifice, possessiveness, and... there would just be no end to this.

What is love, really?

I want to write about this because I myself am so curious over what went wrong in my previous relationship. I know love can be applied not only to our boyfriends/husbands/life partners but... maybe I want to focus more on this first. Is there really love? or is it just using that someone to achieve my goals? or is it just another phenomena that teenager has to go through? Is it peer pressure? or am I just giving in to that someone such that I won't feel uncomfortable? I have spent months trying to look for the meaning of love. I have not fully comprehended it now. But I guess there are some things which are worth sharing here.

Firstly, I ask myself about my love for my Creator. Do I love God?

I started off analyzing this by my feelings. Do I feel things for God? Ugh, how do I feel for something/someone that I can't even see. Why would I do this, I guess we can get the answer from the first woman ever on earth, Eve. Why did the snake approach Eve, not Adam? because women generally judge by feelings, which then became a weakness that the snake used to cause the fall of mankind to the evil power.

Again I ask, do I love God? how do I know how to love God? I then came to an understanding of that here :

God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him

To know how to love God, is to first learn about how God has loved us. Though, I believe that we, limited sinners can never love God the way God has first loved us, I am pretty sure it is the way to learn how to love God. To understand that love through His Son, Jesus Christ who had died not only to pay for our sins but also to free us from the chains of the evil power, to restore our relationship with God. God doesn't love us because of His feelings or emotions for us. His love is purely unconditional, it is not because of who we are, the pureness of our life, for goodness' sake, He loved us even while we were still sinners! It is just because of His loving nature. Again, God is Love.

John 3:16, "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life."

Romans 5:8,"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

How to love God?

Matthew 22:37, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind."

For me, looking at this verse alone, might be useful :

Exodus 20:3,""You shall have no other gods before me."

Putting God as our first priority, and as colossians 3:23 says "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men". Maybe the best way to put it is Christ Lordship, which happened to be the theme for a camp held in May.

Now back to my original question. So what is love?
I know these verses have been quoted like thousands of times, but to me, it is still the best definition of love I could find :

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.

I've stopped searching for feelings. Many times I've been deceived by my own feelings. I used too much of them. Maybe the evil spirit is even using my own feelings against myself. How scary is one's feeling if uncontrolled! God's grace has opened my eyes to learn to understand love through Him, not through human emotions and feelings.

Love is not a spontaneous thing. It's not an accident, it is not an uncontrollable feeling. There's no such thing as love at first sight but I do believe in God's work in mutual/one-way attraction of men to women or vice versa.

I guess love is a step forward. It is the decision made to commit ourselves to being patient, kind, not envious, not proud, not arrogant, not rude, not self-seeking, not easily angered, keeping no record of wrongs, delighting not in evil, but rejoicing with the truth. A decision made to always protect, trust, hope, and persevere. However not forgetting to love and serve Jesus Christ, "We love because he first loved us" (1 John 4:19). In fact, it should be the main, most important thing in a relationship between man and woman.

We're living in this filthy world with heavy misuse of the term "love". Fallen men are so rationally limited that they equate love with emotions, lusts, feelings.

I believe that those souls that have not been saved do not know what love is, though they might claim that they do. They will never understand what real love is. Love which is not abused by fallen man. If they have not experienced God, God's love, the love for the unworthy, the unconditional love, the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, how can they ever know love, which is God Himself?

1 John 4:7-11, "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another."

Try not to understand love from feelings, temporary emotions, that sort of things. Think of unconditional love. Love despite. Think of parents loving their children, it may be the nearest, though it will never be the same as God's love for us, for nothing will be.

Nice one

John Newton used to tell a whimsical story, and laugh at it, too, of a good woman who said, in order to prove the doctrine of election,

"Ah! sir, the Lord must have loved me before I was born, or else He would not have seen anything in me to love afterwards."

Psalm 2 : Another reflection

Read Psalm 2

Why do the nations conspire and the peoples plot in vain?
Darkness can never overcome light. There are no ways in which created,limited and polluted men can find a way to destroy God's plan. Thus it is in vain.
God chooses David in advance to be king. And there are rebels, other kings and their armies who gather together to stop that him from being king. If only they know that they are not waging war against normal human being, but against the Almighty God. And God's promise to David were fulfilled. He just needs to have confidence in God's promise.

God principally proves his faithfulness in this, that he does not forsake the work of his own hands, but continually defends those whom he has once received into his favour. - John Calvin

What I can learn from this passage, when I relate it to my life is that about the Promise of God. We have seen God's promise to David, to make him king, and it was fulfilled. And how God's promise Israel for a Saviour, and it was also fulfilled. We have observed the Old Testaments and how the are fulfilled in the New Testaments. Every single bit of our life has God's fingerprint on it. Slowly molding and shaping us into His perfect plan. And all we need to have is confidence in Him. Stop worrying, and start surrendering all to Him. Trust in His Great Plan. If we do not submit to Him, then we are just like the nations and the peoples who conspire and plot but in vain.

I've been listening to the tape about "the doctrine of salvation" and I point that I can relate to this is that whatever bad things that happens in our life, sufferings, pain, sickness, whatever that is the opposite of good, they are not good things in disguise. It's just that God is using good things, as well as those bad things to fulfill His plan in our life. And God will never fail.

Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him,who have been called according to his purpose

And there's something we can learn from David too, the author of this Psalm. That he called himself the Anointed One, because he knew that his kingship was under God's command and authority. And He wrote this psalm also as a prophecy to the coming of Christ, the Son of God. He believes that his kingdom is a mere shadow of a greater kingdom whose king is Christ.

As usual, I would like to end off with words from Calvin, which we can still relate in this world we are living in. It might be a little bit lengthy, but I think every word speaks very clearly of God's message in this psalm :

Wicked men may now conduct themselves as wickedly as they please, but they shall at length feel what it is to make war against heaven. God is so far exalted above the men of this world, that the whole mass of them could not possibly obscure his glory in the least degree. As often, then, as the power of man appears formidable to us, let us remember how much it is transcended by the power of God. In these words there is set before us the unchangeable and eternal purpose of God effectually to defend the kingdom of his Son, of which he is the founder; and this may well support our faith amid the troublous storms of the world. Whatever plots, therefore, men may form against it, let this one consideration be sufficient to satisfy us, that they cannot render ineffectual the anointing of God.

Psalm 1 : A reflection

I have been using the New Testament chapters as my quiet time source. Currently, I just finished the Book of Luke, and entering John tonight. Sometimes, I do my quiet time in the morning as well, but lately, it seems very dry. I went through chapter by chapter in the New Testament night and morning, at night it would seem very effective, full of reflection. In the morning it would turn boring and with little reflection. I guess I'm not going to stop the morning quiet time, but instead, I found a new source for reflection : the Book of Psalms.

Anyhow, I'm going to write anything I've learnt from the book, just so that I can remember it well.
Read Psalm 1

Why is that chapter put as the first chapter in Psalm?
It is a gateway to the sanctuary. The key, the wisdom asking the worshipers of the Lord to possess the right attitude towards the law of God before having any personal conversation with Him.

It struck me.

Do I have the right attitude? Do I delight in the law of the Lord? Do I meditate on his law day and night? And mind you, meditate comprises of memorizing, repeating and reflecting on the law. Am I that hardworking and perservering to even have the correct quality to have a personal chat with the Lord?

I wanted so much to answer Yes. But I would just be lying to myself. This is something I have to learn. When I receive Jesus Christ as my saviour, there is a war inside of me. The war between the old me, the one still controlled by sin, and the new redeemed me, the one who hates sin. I am given, by grace, the ability to not sin, or in other words, now I can choose to follow Christ or to follow evil.

But how then do I learn, how do I grow and how can I strive to be more like Christ? Again, it's back to His Word. I need to maintain quiet times, personal chats and reflections with Him. Then I can have the longing inside me, the attitude to love and desire God's Words. To saturate myself in it. To have intimate covenant with God.

He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers.

If we have the right attitude in our covenant with Him, then we are like the tree, deeply rooted, thanks to His Word. And not only will we be strong, we will flourish and bloom because the living water, the divine grace, Jesus Christ is with us.

Yes, eventhough the wicked seems to be living prosperous life now. But what's the use of a prosperous life in this temporary world. For they are like tree that is dead and rootless, when God's judgement comes, they will be destroyed.

The Lord wants me to be strong, to keep my focus on His Words, on His Promise and to persevere, be righteous until eventually His Kingdom come. Who can stand this world : attracting us with pleasures, enjoyments, relaxations, anything that causes us ecstasy. Who can stand the world which rejects us, insults and condemns us? And as I have learnt from my friend, some are even against iscf, the indonesian christian fellowship in NUS. We must be strong.

Like St. Augustine had once said : "God had one son on earth without sin, but never one without suffering ". The Kingdom of God may seem like a mustard seed now, but persevere and turn our eyes upon Jesus, the Promise, and feel the blessings, and joy, and peace, knowing that we are His Children.

I don't know whether this contains a proper reflection.
I don't know whether what I've written made sense.
I just know that I don't know much,
and I will keep striving on learning His Words.

1 Samuel 3:10 says "Speak, for your servant is listening."
O God, speak to me as I listen to your Words. Amen

I want to end this reflection with a conclusion made by John Calvin about this chapter :

Instead, therefore, of allowing ourselves to be deceived with their imaginary felicity, let us, in circumstances of distress, have ever before our eyes the providence of God, to whom it belongs to settle the affairs of the world, and to bring order out of confusion.
- John Calvin

What's So Amazing About Grace : My Reflection

As I look back on my own pilgrimage, marked by wanderings, detours, and dead ends, I see now that what pulled me along was search my for grace ... I have barely tasted of grace myself, have rendered less than I have received, and I am in no wise, an 'expert' on grace. These are, in fact, the very reasons that impel me to write. I want to know more, to understand more, to experience more grace ... Accept then, here at the beginning, that I write as a pilgrim qualified only by my craving for grace.

-- Philip Yancey

Before reading this book, I've never seriously put myself in deep thoughts about the word "grace". Like I've evern put myself in any deep thought. But it's true, I've been taking for granted the word "grace". I've learnt the word since God knows when. It is preached so oftenly in church, it is taught in my Christianity class back in school, and most importantly, it has been shown to me even before I was born. "Before you were born!?!? Don't be kidding me!" you would think. Do read this then :

• For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight.
  ephesians 1:4
  

• For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God.
  ephesians 2:8

Now on the book. The interesting thing about this book is that when you look at the title and you think "At last, somewhere I can find the true meaning of grace!", you will be disappointed because Yancey is far from trying to define grace.

He refers to the Roman Catholic Church having destroyed grace by tring to dissect it. Probably like dissecting a frog to see how it works!, while the frog dies in the process. We destroy life in our quest for the meaning of life. Instead, Yancey illustrates grace by example, just like Jesus using parables. He wants us to FEEL grace instead of defining it. Learn by experience, just as many other things in world.

At this point of time, I have to remind myself not to put high hopes in this writing.

What do I learn from reading this book then?

Firstly,

Grace was the most important message Jesus brought to this unforgiving world. That through Him, all the unforgivables inside us are forgiven.

Aware of our inbuilt resistance to grace, Jesus talked about it often. He described a world suffused with God's grace: where the sun shines on people good and bad; where birds gather seeds gratis, neither plowing nor harvesting to earn them; where untended wildflowers burst into bloom on the rocky hillsides. Like a visitor from a foreign country who notices what the natives overlook, Jesus saw grace everywhere. Yet he never analyzed or defined grace, and almost never used the word. Instead, he communicated grace through stories we know as parables.

If we have experienced that grace, why then do we not strive to forgive the unforgivable in others? Why should God forgive us, if we don't even care to forgive others?

I know, forgiving is easier said than done. Sometimes, it's hard to even forgive someone who has hurt our feelings. Imagine the prophet Hosea, whose wife has abandoned him, committed adultery. Hosea continued to love his wife in spite of that and finally brought her home after being asked by God to do so.

The LORD said to me, "Go, show your love to your wife again, though she is loved by another and is an adulteress. Love her as the LORD loves the Israelites, though they turn to other gods and love the sacred raisin cakes." Hosea 3:1

What is the message here? God wants Hosea to show grace to his wife, the way God has shown grace to the Israelites. GRACE by forgiveness. Does his wife deserve to be brought home? No. Grace is about not deserving what you receive.

You might notice also, that this shouldn't be the end of this reflection. But I have to end it here, and continue the next time. Remember about starting small, and growing big. Remember the Kingdom of God as small as the mustard seed now. Remember. Yes, I am talking to myself

first attempt

So this is my maiden attempt at writing seriously in this blog.

The reason for the delay is mainly because I have too high an expectation of myself writing a perfect entry like a pastor delivering his/her sermons. Too unrealistic to be true. Furthermore, I am not a good writer, I do not have a brain that can properly organize thoughts like a PC. Eventually,I decided to give myself more time to grow. To start small, and pray that God will lead me in improving my writing skills.

I've been listening to Pdt. Yohan Candawasa lectures about the doctrine of salvation (SOTERIA). It is truly eye-opening for me, to learn deeply the concepts of God's salvation.

Basically, SOTERIA is about being saved from the our deviation and put back into His mighty plan. There are two consequences of salvation :
1. Negative (FROM) - saved from sins (our deviation)
2. Positive (FOR) - saved such that we can live a holy life (in His mighty plan)

It is then dangerous to think only in the negative aspect, that Jesus died on the cross MERELY to save us from sins. To be more clear about this, an example about a fire that happened inside a building is provided. To escape from the fire, people will have to use the emergency exit. However once they go THROUGH the exit, free from the fire, the emergency exit will have no further use for them. So is Jesus useless after we've accepted Him as Our Saviour? Is that the extent of His power? NO!

Not only are we cleansed from our sins, we are also freed from sins (kuasa dosa). We are no more slaves to sins. As seen in Rome 6:6-7
"For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin might be done away with,^[a] that we should no longer be slaves to sin— because anyone who has died has been freed from sin."

I've been always thinking of Jesus' death ONLY to pay my sins. I've never thought about it freeing me from sins, from the power of evil. That is probably why I kept falling into making the same mistakes over and over again. That is probably why I kept repenting and acknowledging my sins but soon I was far from God again. I've seen my own brother now, so far from God. Imagine 4 years ago, he was telling my grandpa about Jesus, he was telling my mom he wanted to be a priest. Where is that now? I've seen friends I used to go church with, not living wholly as a Christian. Yes, Sunday is going-to-church day but the rest of the days are mine. I can do anything to it according to my will. If people continue to abuse God, to abuse Jesus as a tool to clean them from their sins, they will never attain the true salvation because they have never understood the true meaning of salvation.

God's grace is too great for my mind to understand. God's grace gave me FAITH in Him. I once was lost, I once abandoned Him but God's grace found me. God's grace let the spiritually dead me live again. God's grace lead me into new friendships, into a new community, a Christian fellowship that taught me more than any community I've ever been in. It was His Grace that led me into this level of understanding of salvation. Now I know that I truly have that salvation. Why? of course, the Holy Spirit working inside me tells me so and also because now I have a different view of sins. We should not be saddened and scared by the punishment due to our sins, but instead we should be scared of the sin itself. We are just like a child who occasionally does something wrong and is given punishment by his parents. The child will usually stop doing wrong merely because the punishment he received before was harsh, and the memory of it is too excruciating for him to repeat the same wrongdoings. But he has never understood why his action is wrong. This is dangerous, isn't it?
It is thus important not to understand salvation only by "THROUGH Jesus", but also by "IN Jesus". Saved through Him from our sins and then live in Him free from the power of evil.

Yes, I agree that I have not understood salvation as a whole, well who can? God's way is incomprehensible by man, and all we can do is to sought to understand something that is supernaturally wonderful.

I think I'll stop here first. I dare not write any longer lest I get my hopes too high up and cancel the post again. There are just TOO MUCH information I wish I can write but I guess I'll just leave it to the next post. Be patient, pat !